Dear Google Ad Sense

And now for a brief [non-]commercial message....


I got the following in an email from "Google AdSense":

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Hello,

Thank you for your interest in Google AdSense. Unfortunately, after reviewing your application, we're unable to accept you into AdSense at this time.

We did not approve your application for the reasons listed below.

Issues:

Insufficient content

Further detail:

Insufficient content: To be approved for AdSense and show relevant ads on your site, your pages need to have enough text on them for our specialists to review and for our crawler to be able to determine what your pages are about.

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There is no return address or other usable feedback mechanism that is non-automated or case specific. Public forums are NOT case specific.

Alas this only proves that Google's automated monetization system has insufficient neurons [and human oversight] to know what human content, poetic and otherwise constitute human thought. 

I suppose that this is a good thing considering the fact Google's rules for NSFW content effectively squelches any content that may be considered offensive: Lenny Bruce, beat poets, James Joyce. Norman Mailer, and many, many others need not apply. Effectively Google suppresses freedom of speech in the name of 'correctness of speech'.



Dear Google AdSense:
Thank you for freeing me from the  burden of providing you with free content for you to use with your advertising. Now I can focus on actually writing... and guaranteeing my readers an ad-less reading experience [something rare and precious]   but it does mean that at some point I will [if successful] be moving to other internet accommodations. 

The fact that your web crawlers are unable to determine that these meager pages do indeed contain human readable content is an insult to human intelligence in general and a specific complement to the intelligence of any human who reads this... It is not often these days that a human can be shown to have more comprehension than their mechanical offspring.

I certainly hope that you will enjoy this feeble human's attempt at expressing things which you have no ability to comprehend and that it proves to be enlightening.  Human progress depends on going places which are "not suitable for ___[fill in the blank]____". 


regards,

jhc

Tuneless Tune

One Sunday afternoon in 1993 I laid down for a nice little nap.

When I woke up I feverishly scrawled down the following lyrics.

[UPDATE] A slow version mp3 is HERE

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Tuneless Tune

Verse 1:

After show time in Neverland
I had no place to be
so I stumbled down that Yellow Brick Road
to see what I could see

Now Babylon and Uruk
Were filled with a blowin' dust
An' from Pittsburgh to Paris
Was a sea of rust

So I stumbled blindly onward
To that place between west and east
And Fell into the darkness
They call the Belly of the Beast

Chorus:
At a bar set in Dreamtime
I pull'd myself up a chair
To fill myself with memories
Of which I was unaware

Verse 2:

Well, there sat Cap'n Ahab
A call'd the Wand'rin' Jew
And on his lap sat the tyrant
Known as Little Boy Blue

Their Love was a strange one
As strange as it was new
The glimmer in the old man's eyes
Said all the rumors were true
At the bar sits the Dutchman

Lost now between his beers
All that sailing from where to when
Has finally stripped his gears

Chorus:
In a bar set in Dreamtime
I pull'd myself up a chair
To fill myself with memories
Of which I was unaware

Verse 3:

Mata Hari and Little Egypt
Are kissing in the darkened room
Their loving fills the emptiness
With a passion we all consume

When in comes the Jester
Followed by his friend the Thief
While the Thief steals from all of us
The Jester gives comic relief

Now Siduri is the barmaid
Who once loved a famous king
But he died five thousand years ago
And didn't leave her a thing

Chorus:
'Cept a bar set in Dreamtime
I pull'd myself up a chair
To fill myself with memories
Of which I was unaware

Verse 4:

Well Nero fiddles for the band
And Gabriel blows the horn
While Jellyroll slaps the ivory
And sings of love forlorn

All the while I sat there
In the Belly of the Beast, My friend
I laughed and cried for all of us,
All our hubris and our sin

When I finally stumbled outta there
It must a been 'bout the Crack of Doom
I took with me only these memories
And the words to this tuneless tune.

Chorus:
From a bar set in Dreamtime
I pull'd myself up a chair
To fill myself with memories
Of which I was unaware  


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Now one might wonder why this is odd. I dreamed this. Think about it.

Comments? Questions? Objections?

©2014 by j.h. crook.
all rights reserved